Time catches up after the fly goes down

I wake up every day feeling like I am 29 years old.

Then it takes me 30 years to pee when I go to the bathroom, and I start feeling my age again.

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My wife does not threaten me with divorce if I do something stupid or I refuse to do what she asks. A simple "I'm going to kill you" is...

If you think being single and dating women is tough, try dating women after you get married.

My wife knew I was a sex addict before we got married. But with her help, I was able to quit cold turkey.